T is for Trust. Whether our confidence level is high
or not, whether we are feeling optimistic or not, one thing is certain, our
trust in our ability to tell a story is always humming through our blood.
Deep down every writer trusts his/her ability to
write stories that readers will love and create characters that readers will
adore. Perhaps, that is the reason we stick on to our writing.
Though at times my confidence and optimism levels
touch rock bottom. I trust my ability as a writer to write good stories that
will entertain readers.
We trust other writers when we send our books to
them for critique and feedback. Sadly, an Indian writer (thank God, she is not my crit partner) and a writing
friend thought that my critique of her short story was to put her down and not
for the betterment of the story. Her lack of trust hurt me. I had edited her story, rewritten it in places. It won a prize in the competition. She refused to acknowledge my assistance and infact denied it altogether.
How high is your trust in your ability as a writer? Has someone's lack of trust hurt you?
Note: this is my post for the A to Z
Challenge. My theme is Emotions and Feelings writers experience.
Too bad your friend wasn't mature enough to accept feedback. She sounds like so many of my former students who complained about my comments on their papers. Typically they would say that their MOTHER or FRIEND thought the paper was great. Of course, they did! Don't ask for an HONEST opinion if you don't want to hear it.
ReplyDeleteWendy at Jollett Etc.
I do trust my critique partners. Their suggestions are usually spot on.
ReplyDeleteIt's such a great feeling to know you have others you can trust with your work. You know they're going to tell you the truth to help you, not to hurt you.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry that happened with your friend. I sometimes have a terrible time trusting my ability to write but keep fighting those doubts.
ReplyDeleteJust as with every other aspect of life I guess its important as a writer to be able to put your trust in someone, to know that anything they may have to say is in your best interest even if at the time it might not be want you want to hear.
ReplyDeleteSorry your critique friend took your critique the wrong way. I depend on my critique partners. They catch so many things I miss, and often have such great suggestions!
ReplyDeleteSome days I trust my gut that I'm doing this whole writer thing right. Other days, I have such doubt! But I just got published this year, so at least my publisher trusts my writing:) Now, on to writing other stories!
ReplyDeleteSadly not all that say they want critique help are open to hear anything beyond "this is the best thing since sliced bread!" but one thing is for sure: eventually they'll learn. I trust my CP and hope I receive the same trust. No bad experiences yet...
ReplyDeleteIt's too bad your friend didn't accept feedback well. It sounds like your advice was really helpful.
ReplyDeleteI love this. We always talk about trusting others, but it is true we have to trust ourselves or nothing will ever get done.
ReplyDeleteAs far as trusting others with early drafts there are few I trust and a few that trust me. I like it that way.
Brandon Ax: Writer's Storm
Hi friends, the lady I mentioned was not a critique partner (thank god for that)she was just another writer I knew. My crit partners are absolutely adorable and they trust my feedback.
ReplyDeleteI freelance write for my "day job," so I have to have a lot of trust/confidence in what I'm doing. When I end up with a difficult client, though, it is tougher. I tend not to work with really picky people for long!
ReplyDeleteTrust is a difficult thing. I find I trust others sometimes more than I trust myself when it comes to stories I write. It's something I'm working on as I really do know the story I want to tell better than anyone else.
ReplyDeleteGreat post:) It reminds me of something my uncle told me once (he's a pilot). Up in the air with him, he'd sometimes let me fly the plane, but I'd get a bit nervous. I asked how he did it all the time, and he said "you have to trust your instruments, and evertything will be fine." Same goes for writing, trust your instruments, whether a pen, computer, or your own common sense...the rest will follow:)
ReplyDeleteI'd say I lost trust in myself when my last book wasn't snapped up by an agent. Six months later I got an agent and a tiny epubber, but I never regained my trust. Maybe some day I will...
ReplyDeleteThat's harsh. It's so easy to give or take offense in this industry.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was first starting critiquing, I realized I was forcing my own style or voice on other authors. Since that time, I've tried to stick to the rules and guidelines I've studied, and only to suggest rewording something when it's difficult to understand or there's a very solid industry-backed reason for changing. It's so easy to want to tamper with EVERYTHING you read, right? Sometimes the only way to perfection is through pain.
True Heroes from A to Z
A writer shouldn't ask for feedback if they don't want criticism, good or bad. I always hope for honesty.
ReplyDeleteA little faith in yourself an belief you can do better helps, I think.
ReplyDeletemood
Moody Writing
How horrible for you, Rachna...
ReplyDeleteThat person is an idiot. She was probably jealous of your ability and that is why she turned on you.
Don't lose faith or trust, though. Mostly our community is full of wonderful, caring, and trusting people.
It is sad that some folks are unable to accept constructive criticism. I hope it does not prevent you from being honest when the opportunity arises again--the recipient the next time will be much more appreciative.
ReplyDeleteTrust can always been an issue.
I have recently let a colleague down at work as I have too many things going right now--I know the best thing to do is just apologize and try to move forward.
I trust my writing enough to honor the critiquing I get, even if I don't always agree with it.
ReplyDeleteLove your point... we do keep writing because we think some people will love it as much as we love it ourselves. :) Writer’s Mark
It is hard not take a critique personally, especially as we're so personally involved with our own writing. I've had several disappointing critiques, but ultimately we have to put our wounded egos aside or we will never become the great writers we know we can be.
ReplyDeleteI always go by the rule that if more than one person says the same thing about a piece of writing then they probably are right, no matter how much you like that bit or what you were trying achieve by it!
I trust that I'm a good writer. I don't trust that I'm a great writer. I have a friend who doesn't believe any advice I give her, which makes me feel like a hack at times.
ReplyDeleteI am very trusting of other writers, but I had to stop doing detailed critiques for beginning writers because their feelings often got hurt, no matter how kindly I crafted my comments. They didn't understand yet how much work must be spent revising and self-editing before our work is ready for publication.
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