Friday, April 25, 2014

V is for Vulnerable

V is for Vulnerable. It’s our state of mind when our books are out in the world. There is this sense of utter vulnerability when I send my entire manuscript to my crit partners. 

This sense intensifies when I sent the MS to an agent last year. And also an editor. Gosh, every single moment there were all kinds of silly thoughts in my head. What must she be thinking? Did she like my story? Did she like my writing style? Does she think I suck as a writer? I drove myself mad with all those crazy worries.

With time these feelings of vulnerability slowly lessen. I am worried about the new books and not my earlier ones. So much time has passed since they were published that I have stopped worrying about them.

Some writers say that they avoid reading reviews. I would not do that but I would not let it affect me (easier said than done).

How do you all tackle that vulnerability when your books are out in the world?

Note: this is my post for the A to Z Challenge. My theme is Emotions and Feelings writers experience.



20 comments:

  1. I'm not sure!
    Putting our work out there certainly makes us vulnerable. As far as feedback, by CPs or reviewers, I guess we just have to try and learn from them (after giving them some peculiar names in our minds), and move on. If you find a great answer, shoot me an email lol

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  2. Think of all the great writers who were not appreciated in their lifetime.
    Remember that you are depending on the opinions of people who might not be as smart or as talented as you.
    Wendy at Jollett Etc.

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  3. I'm trying not to read reviews, but occasionally I peek! Someone gave my book one star on Goodreads with no explanation. She was, like, 30...and my book is for 8-year-olds, so I'm not sure if the one star was on behalf of her child or her, but I couldn't help but let it bug me. I'm going to try not to obsess over it!

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  4. I always feel vulnerable when I send my work out into the world. The level/intensity varies with what what I'm sending where, to who, etc but that vulnerability is there. I don't see that changing any time soon!

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  5. I think over time it becomes easier. Maybe it's desensitizing.

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  6. I try not to think about it. I know some people will like what I write, others won't. (Hopefully more will like it than won't!) I focus on producing the best thing I can. If I'm happy with it, then I'm better able to handle whatever criticism might come along.

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  7. I loved this post as it put me in mind of my author friend who says her books are like her babies, that she cannot rest until they are' put to bed' (in other words published).

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  8. First the actual act of writing can make us vulnerable because it's personal in many ways. And then all the steps that follow that makes us even more vulnerable. I'm a shy person by nature and I stress all the time, so it's amazing that I continue to write and put myself through this. But I won't ever stop! :) I'm a new author, so I think I'll have to wait a while before I learn to deal with it.

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  9. I think that sharing anything that you've written can make you feel vulnerable. You hope that people are going to like what you've written although you know that not everyone will. I have found attending a writing group and having to regularly read out my work and take feedback from others has helped me feel a little less vulnerable. Good luck with your writing journey.

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  10. I think for writers, it's the nature of the beast. :-)
    Deb@ http://debioneille.blogspot.com

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  11. Hi friends, vulnerability is something we have to live with. Hopefully, it will get better with time and we can learn to detach ourselves from people's reactions with the thought that we did our best and the rest is up to the readers and we cannot control readers' reactions.

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  12. You know, when I'm discouraged I actually go back and read the good reviews. It keeps me going. Before that, I'd go back and read the positive responses from CP's and other readers. It's hard not to feel vulnerable, but you have to believe in yourself. If you don't, how can you expect others to?

    True Heroes from A to Z

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  13. I'm one who doesn't read reviews. I just realized I don't have a thick enough skin yet but it's something I'm working on.

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  14. I think I've developed a hide as tough as that of a crocodile. I felt so vulnerable when my first book was published, but my third will be out in November and I'm pretty relaxed. (But I won't kid myself, I'll be watching reviews, sales rankings, and library purchases just like always.) :D

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  15. I have no books in the world; just a few short stories in unpaying e-zines. Still, it was scary to submit, and get accepted, and then to see it published.

    And then I forgot about the stories. I think I am the only person I know to review a short story anthology. Even without reviews, it is still unnerving to think someone might read one of my stories and have an opinion about them.

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  16. I felt vulnerable with my first book, but the second time around I'm feeling okay.

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  17. It's so hard not to feel vulnerable especially when it's your first book. Take those compliments (from agents, publishers, readers, critique partners) and keep improving:) Even if they (agents and publishers) reject your ms. Someone else might enjoy it very much:)

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  18. Vulnerability is a mental state.
    It happens on many levels.
    Diving into a good book or writing a story are ways of dealing with our vulnerability.

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  19. Oh I know those feelings very well!

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  20. I felt vulnerable with the first book. In fact, after it came out and I got some mean comments and mediocre reviews, I quit writing for a long time. Now, with my novella on Amazon, I was thrilled to get reviews across the board. Some are mean, but I've found they don't hurt me like they did years ago. Actually, the one that makes me worry is one that said the novella sounded like a teenager wrote it. That one is echoing in my ears over and over again, and I ask myself if I should learn something from it.

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